It’s a question we hear all the time: Can we just agree to no child support?
Sometimes, both parents earn about the same. Sometimes they share custody pretty evenly. Other times, the custodial parent just doesn’t want the hassle of collecting monthly child support payments from the other side. And on paper, that might all seem reasonable.
The short answer? Yes. Parents can agree to waive child support. And here in Missouri, courts often approve those arrangements if they’re clearly thought-out and make sense for the child.
That said, it’s not as simple as just signing a piece of paper and moving on. There are some important legal points you’ll want to understand before heading down that path.
Courts Usually Respect Agreements—But There’s a Catch
Missouri tends to give parents a fair amount of leeway when it comes to figuring out what works for their family. Compared to other areas of family law, courts are generally open to child support arrangements that reflect what both parents want, even if that means choosing not to exchange money at all.
The idea is that parents often know what works best for their family. So if both of you agree that waiving child support makes sense, and if your plan holds up under basic legal standards, the court will often approve it.
But here’s the catch: the court still has to review the plan. Even if you both agree, it has to be clear that the arrangement doesn’t shortchange the child or create problems down the line. And if it looks like one parent’s trying to offload responsibility or avoid accountability, the court’s not going to let that slide.
Why Some Parents Decide to Waive Child Support
Not every family needs or wants a traditional support setup—and that’s okay. We’ve helped plenty of parents put together plans that skip regular child support payments while still meeting the child’s needs.
Here are some common reasons we see:
- Both parents earn about the same and split expenses as they go
- They share custody 50/50 and just track major costs informally
- The custodial parent feels financially stable and doesn’t need support
- One parent pays for things like health insurance or tuition instead of sending money each month
- They’d rather skip the paperwork and keep things simple
- They want the freedom to adjust things informally as needs change
These choices aren’t wrong. In many cases, they’re perfectly reasonable. But they still need to be written up clearly and submitted properly if you want them to stick.
When Courts Might Push Back on a Support Waiver
Most of the time, courts respect agreements between parents. But not always. There are a few situations that make judges pause (and sometimes say no).
One Parent Earns Much More Than the Other
If one parent’s struggling financially while the other earns six figures, the court is going to ask questions. Even if you both agree on a waiver, the judge might not believe it serves the child’s best interests.
This comes up often when:
- The custodial parent earns significantly less
- One parent handles most day-to-day expenses
- The income split creates an uneven financial burden
The Agreement Is Too Casual or Too Vague
Verbal agreements or informal promises won’t hold up in court. Judges want something they can enforce if things break down later.
Red flags include:
- No written agreement
- Vague terms like “we’ll split things as needed”
- No mention of how specific expenses will be handled
If it’s not clear and detailed, it won’t get approved.
What the Court Actually Needs to See
If you’re planning to waive child support (or structure it differently) it has to be done right. Courts don’t require a complicated filing, but they do expect a few key things.
Your Agreement Should Be:
- In writing, with clear terms (no gray areas)
- Voluntarily agreed upon by both parents, with no pressure or coercion
- Focused on the child, not just what the parents prefer
- Specific about expenses—who covers what (medical, school, childcare, etc.)
- Submitted to the court as part of your divorce or custody case
If you skip the court approval step, even the best plan won’t be enforceable. And if anything changes or goes south later, you’ll have no legal ground to stand on.
Smarter Alternatives to Waiving Support Entirely
For many families, there’s a middle ground between paying monthly child support and waiving it altogether. These options give you flexibility while still staying within the law.
Deviate from the Guidelines—With a Reason
Missouri allows for structured deviations from the standard child support guidelines if there’s good cause. This might apply when:
- Parents have shared custody
- Incomes are very similar
- Traditional payments don’t reflect the reality of how the child’s needs are being covered
The key is showing the court your plan still protects the child.
Divide Expenses Instead of Exchanging Payments
Rather than one parent writing a check, you can split responsibilities. For example:
- One parent covers health insurance, dental, and co-pays
- The other pays for school fees, extracurriculars, or tutoring
This can work well as long as it’s written clearly and backed by a court order.
Use a Special Account for Support
Some parents prefer to put funds into a trust or a dedicated account for specific needs, like:
- Education
- Medical care
- Therapy or special programs
It’s a practical way to keep things transparent and purpose-driven, especially if you both want more control over how money is used.
How to Protect a Child Support Agreement Over Time
Even if the court signs off on your plan to waive child support, that doesn’t mean the situation will stay the same forever. Things shift—jobs change, kids get older, and what worked once may stop working.
To keep your agreement solid and avoid future headaches, it helps to plan ahead.
Build in Some Safeguards
- Clearly explain why this setup made sense at the time—judges like seeing context
- Spell out who’s covering major costs like healthcare, school, and childcare
- Set times to check in on how the arrangement’s working (yearly works for many families)
- Keep clear records of what each parent is contributing financially
And remember, child support can always be modified later on if circumstances change enough. A court-approved agreement isn’t carved in stone, but having one makes updates easier to handle when the time comes.
What to Expect from the Court Process
If you and your co-parent agree to handle support in a non-traditional way—or to waive child support altogether—you’ll need to formalize that plan properly. Here’s what that usually involves:
The Steps to Make It Official
- Write up a detailed agreement
- Be specific about how the child’s needs will be covered
- File your agreement with the court where your custody or divorce case is being handled
- Show up to any scheduled hearings (if required in your county)
- Wait for the judge to review and approve the terms
The court won’t rubber-stamp just anything; it still has to make sure the plan meets legal standards and serves the child’s best interests. But if everything’s clear, fair, and well thought out, judges in Missouri are often willing to approve it.
When It’s Worth Getting Legal Help
You’re not required to hire a lawyer to waive child support but having someone who knows the system can make a big difference. That’s especially true if your situation is a little more complex or you’re building something outside the usual monthly payment setup.
We can help you:
- Draft a strong agreement that holds up in court
- Make sure the plan meets Missouri’s legal requirements
- Add protections in case either parent’s situation changes down the road
- Address tax considerations or unexpected consequences
- Explore alternative options that might suit your family better
At Raza Family Law Solutions, we help parents build support plans that reflect real life, not just what’s on a form. Whether you’re looking to waive child support entirely or simply create something more flexible, we’ll walk you through the legal steps so your agreement is clear, fair, and enforceable.
Reach out anytime if you’re ready to start that conversation. We’re here to help you build a support plan that works—and keeps working as your family grows and changes.
